Sometimes we notice person’s change, slightly change when we are talking.
Eye contact, some body movement, breath, etc.
there are two choices
– Don’t worry, I just talk
– I feel something strange, so I quit this topic and change other topics.
The ability of finding or noticing the slightly change of persons you are talking is really important for communication.
There is an important process for communication.
calibration -> pacing -> keep rapport -> leading
It means
– checking the people/topics/information carefully (calibration)
– try to have a communication somehow(pacing)
– getting relationship between two
– leading others for your purpose
Noticing others change is calibration stage.
I’ll write down this calibration stage in detail to next.
I used three NLP technique for this purpose. 1) Strong purpose with five senses, achievable, and that makes all people happy. 2) Admitting drinking non-alchol drink, because I might like soda feeling. 3) Imagine bad hangover feeling and remember it with “anchor”.
“Position change” skill is very effective for thinking from other’s point.
The first position = myself
The second position = another person in front of meThe third position = other person who look the person and me
Selfee photo might be taken on the second position. I took myself.
If you enroll envirionment into your selfee photo, it’s the third position, and we have to consider the relation between others and me. That makes the selfee photo being very attractive.
Calibration and Pacing are very important NLP technique.
At this time I watched the lady’s breath on youtube, that means the same timing of both person’s breath easily build good relation each other, that is one of the first contact points for communication.
“Selfee”, that is take a photo by myself has at least three psychological benefit for communication.
1. Mirroring/Matching tequnique
Working together for picture
2. Pacing
Working together with their body movement, breeze etc. same.
3. cognitive dissonance
Once taking a friendly picture, people starts thinking good relation leads this photo.